Whew! Today has been a very long day. Let's see, I stayed up extra late writing my last post to this blog, so I hope you all sincerely read this and enjoy it. Well, it's pretty therapeutic for me as well, but whatever. LOVE ME.
Anywho, I rode a very crowded bus with Alexis from Gramercy to Broadway for our Journalism lecture. Boyhowdy, it was already starting to get super hot even before noon. What's the phrase?--I was sweatier than a whore in church? Or something. I was just really sweaty and gross this whole day and it started on the walk from the bus stop to Tisch Hall.
Although I don't really mind, I like to make a big dramatic deal like I do. My recitation leader of course has us sit in the very front of the lecture, which is almost better I guess. I mean, when I actually want to say something during lecture, Professor Stevens could actually hear me. I have yet to say a word in fear of being teased, and we know how sensitive I am. One tease thrown my way, and I'm sure to fashion the loose threads on my backpack into a vinyl-y noose and try to hang myself. That's right. You'd all feel SO bad. Not really, I'm just way too tired and sometimes nervous of public humiliation to say something during lecture. I guess I really shouldn't be that afraid. What's the worst that can happen? People (including students and faculty) laughing at me? Me flushing from embarassment? Laughing out of nervousness and expelling small amounts of urine while in the process? Who knows? Maybe I'll find out one of these lectures.
Speaking of urine; I really had to pee during class and of course, because of my waiting for free Honest Tea outside of Gould Plaza, I got a really crappy seat by the time I got to class. And I didn't even get any Honest Tea! DUMB. Well, I had to pee during lecture, but I really didn't want to be that one person that gets up in the middle of my row, disrputing my peers as well as just straight-up getting up during lecture. You know what I mean? It's like a spotlight on a mega-straightlaced-priest as a strip-club. A super gay strip club. Okay, let's make the priest a rabbi and the gay strip club an anti-semitic gay sex club. That's how bad it would be--comparable to being called out as a prudish rabbi at a gay-antisemitic-sex-club. It would be bad.
So I held my pee for quite a while. hehe, I almost wrote "...held my pea". Can you imagine? Me sitting in class holding a pea and being all worried about it? I'm ridiculous.
In any case, I was able to think about other things and with enough leg-shakingness to distract me, I was able to hold it until I went to Kimmel to relieve myself.
Of course, me being the smart young man I am, I decided to sit on the outside terraces. I made sure to check which terrace to use; the one on the right was oddly saturated with students eating lunch, but the one of the left was almost completely empty. The reason became clear when I went out to the left terrace and sat down at my usual spot whereI people watch (and make up dialogue for the people walking through WSP. Like saying these two guys who are clearly straight bros, gay, or this old lady and younger girl being a lecherous pedophile and seductive youngster respectively). However, I failed to realize that the left terrace was so empty because the aluminum tables magnified the sunlight (that was appropriately only hitting the left side of Kimmel) a million-fold.
This was one of my dumber moments, but I sat down with such conviction in front of other students, in a clearly horrible spot, that I felt that I shouldn't get up immediately and admit defeat. So I pulled out a packet of reading and pretended to read, but really I was just squinting really hard and trying to think how badly my corneas were being burned every second I was exposed to the fiery death rays refracting from the oddly over-metallic tables. The sunlight also were making me sweat a lot and I had yet to fill my water bottle. It was horrible. It was like being in a desert without water and dignity...but worse.
I finally swallowed my pride and got up and went up to the seventh floor to read more of my material. Of course, the 7th floor computers were working the day that I didn't actually need them. Ugh. Life! So I sat a table and read, and realized I had again made a horrible decision in my seating choice for I sat across the way from a table stocked full of Asians getting ready for Clubfest. Constant Family Guy references, superbly nerdy laughs, cutting of posters with supposed-safety-scissors, and awkward fragmented Chinese phrases littered the airspace and I found it so hard to read, but again, I felt that it would super mean for me to get up, for I would clearly be dissing them if I got up right when I sat down, so I sucked it up again and actually got to a good reading mood. But man, it was like being in Chinese-American-Boater-FoB-Chinatown. It was pretty ridiculous. I'm not trying to be racist. I mean, I'm Chinese-American...I'm just not annoying like they were. Sorry, that's really mean, but man, I really have to vent that they were just down-right annoying. And not cutesy-unintentional annoying, but just unadulterated, unfiltered annoying. If I had a annoyance machine, it would've gone off the charts and exploded, giving me a concussion that I'm sure I would've been grateful for, so I wouldn't have to listen to them and giving me an excuse to not go to class. Sigh. Sorry, that was really long and really mean. I feel bad saying it, but that's what blogs are for, right? Sorry again!
I ran into Kasey and we reminisced on the lovely city of Seattle and the WASL. It was quite wonderful and I headed to Mercer for my Policing Same Sex Desire class and realized I forgot my headphones! My Creative was sitting in my backpack nakedly resting in its pocket ready for me to fondle and use. But without headphones, it was like getting into bed with the hottie of your dreams, but taking off your pants and being like "WHERE DID MY PENIS GO?!" and then remembering that you left it plugged into your laptop back at your dorm.
So I ended walking to Mercer musicless and sexless. We looked at a lot of ancient Greek porn. Ms. Ames would be proud, as we talked about the Hellenistic period and I totally could recognize them! But yeah, we talked a lot about Greek relationships between older men and younger boys and lesbian relationships. Super interesting.
I then went to have lunch with Glenn and Alexis at Upstein where we ran into Andrew and Ritu. I listened in on their conversation about Palin and then Alexis, Glenn, and I went to WSP where we had a conversation next to a shirtless homeless man. It was romantic in a way. But more awkward and distracting. We decided to ditch the shirtless man (who was now looking for his dog and reading a space magazine) and went to Kimmel to get some Yolato. It was delicious.
Glenn departed and me and Alexis went to Coles for Clubfest; we each had booths to run. Goodness, walking in, I swore it was like walking into a sauna, except everyone had clothes on, but were still just as sweaty as you'd imagine at a sauna. It was ridiculous. I had to walk through small seas of people, occasionally being groped and molested by Asian frats. I finally found the Baedeker booth and sat with Lyndsey and Leslie. I have to say I'm a good salesman; I got hellsa people to sign up for the Baedeker list-serve. And apparently I'm Secretary of Baedeker now? Who knows! I met a guy from Macedonia--that was really cool! I'm not sure why, because he wasn't like a Roman warrior, but whatever--I was impressed nonetheless.
After about two hours of sweating, I cleaned up and went back to Gramercy with Alexis. I departed right after to go to the gym, where I worked out slightly with a Black guy. I'm not sure why I'm so preoccupied with race, but it was a first for me. I got some food from Pallads, and ate with Claire, Teresa, Carissa, and Alexis and we went to our RA, Ramil's room. We were the first there and got to sit in chairs while everyone else had to sit on the floor. Suckas! Our ice-breaker was a contest; the three people with the most interesting facts about themselves won coupons to Pink Berry. It was great, for needless to say, I won one. Yeah boy!
I reused my armpit hair-growing tidbit and I guess that pushed me into the top three spots. I don't think I really deserved it, but I'll take it. The other two winners were a girl who was adopted; her mom is Chinese, her dad is...Hispanic I wanna say...and her brother is Guatemalan. The other was a girl whose house blew-up when she was two. Crazy stuff!
I sat with the girls after the RA meeting and laughed at them for a while. While filling out the roommate forms, Teresa had to fill-out the section about hygiene and actually asked Carissa how often she bathes. "Daily...or weekly?" Carissa responded with a sarcastic glare, asking "how long have we lived together ??" and said "No Teresa, I like to go into the bathroom every morning for twenty minutes and turn on the shower...and read" It was hilarious.
Well, that's about it.
Ballin'ly,
Paddy
*Carolina Liar--Beautiful World
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