All We Need Is a Little Bit of Momentum

Wooo, man it's been way too long (that's what she said....?....!)!
So here I am in London. I'm having mixed reactions to being here.
On one hand, it's damn beautiful and it's just pretty cool to be in a completely different environment. On the other, less attractive, arthiritisty hand is the fact that London (pretty much)= European NYC.
Let me put it this way: NYC is a slutty, caked-on make-up kinda gal. London on the other hand is a much more sophisticated whore. She'll let you buy her dinner first, unlike that skanky NYC. As a result, London is fun, but a little more expensive than the 'fun' you can have with NYC (eh, get my drift, eh eh?).
Anways yeah. London is cool, but not the experience I had anticipated.
First off, I'm just constantly tired. I think it might be the jetlag still. I literally changed three time zones within two days. I went from Seattle to Jersey to London within Wednesday and Thursday and it kinda killed me. Then Dean's Circle has these grand plans of constant museum visits and walking tours, which means my sleeptime is being totally gangraped by London culture.
So after getting off of the plane around 9AM local London time, we go through customs. The customs lady was a little rude. She asked me why I was going to London. I answered saying "for school" and she was like "...school...?" I don't know what she had against me going to London for a school trip. Jeez. Not like I was going to use that bomb in my suitcase IN London. Probably just somewhere else.
Afterwards we took a coach bus to our residence hall, passing by these horses that totally looked like cows. No joke. Oh, and we totally passed this billboard just asking for a 'that's what she said' joke; it was a girl about to blow a dandelion. Man, London, can you get more sexual?
The bus ride was quite long and everyone seemed like they had been roofied, because for the most part they were. They shouldn't have been sleeping on the plane. But seriously, everyone was exhausted from traveling. I personally didn't sleep at all on the plane because I was watching TV. I watched four episodes of CSI, and episode of Without a Trace, an episode of The Big Bang Theory, and an episode of House (in which a girl thought she pooped herself but really diarrhead a lot of blood). I also sat next to an Irish lady. She was really cool and even burped really loud. I also sat next to a Middle Eastern man who was a little halitosis-y but really nice as well. I didn't know why I was stuck in the middle of two random people and not any other Dean's Circle kids but whatever.
Anyways, we got to the residence hall to check in, and realized that our residence hall has NO elevators. I had to lug my fatass suitcase up lots of flights of stairs. I was sweating like crazy and breathing hella hard like I had just had crazy sex. Unfortunately that wasn't the real reason. I was convinced that I might just have asthma or be overly obese or that possibly someone may have snuck an asthmatic fatty in my suitcase because that thing was damn heavy.
But yeah. London has been pretty fun so far, despite the lack of prudency our activities have to our research topic of Darwin. So far we've visited the Museum of Natural History, taken a bus/walking tour of Central London and Westminister Abbey, saw the show Blood Brothers, and went to the London Aquarium and the Museum of Garden History. The latter three were the worst of the bunch. Blood Brothers was a tragic story...but very comical at the same time. Maybe there are some cultural things I don't get, but when a Twilight Zone-esque guy with a weird voice sings the actual goings-on in the play like you're dumb and aren't watching the show yourself makes an exorbitant amount of appearances, it gets to be a bit much. Plus the touch of 80s synthesizers just makes THAT much better. Oh boy, yeah it does. The Museum of Garden History. I can't think of a more boring thing a museum could be about. It related very little to Darwin and the garden was nothing that spectacular. The art exhibit wasn't much to look at either. The only things that were entertaining were some of the paintings and illustrations, but for most part, most everything was garden tools--evolution of the lawnmower...or a Veggie-Lamb (a plant people thought was a fusion of a lamb and a vegetable haha)...or a cucumber straightener (AKA the most phallic thing ever (AKA the early horny farmer's wife's sextoy)). The Aquarium just plain sucked. It was still under construction and they make it sound gigantic by saying there are 15 zones in the entire thing. We were able to walk through it in about 40 minutes. The zones, needless to say weren't more than a few steps or something. As my friend put it, it was kind of like walking into someone's house that was a little obsessed with fishtanks (mostly because the tanks were low to the ground and open-air. If that's not a bad idea, I don't know what is. You know some dumbass kid is going to starty playing in it, and next thing you know the kid is drowning or the fishes have been fondled into oblivion). But the view of Big Ben and the London Eye (which, fyi, we don't get to ride because it's under construction GAH! I hate my life!).
So yeah, life is good. London is fun, and I'm hoping to have a good rest of the week here. Other than being crazy tired, London, akthough not the abroad experience I had wanted, is still pretty baller.

WEB BY!
Patrick

*The Hush Sound-Momentum