Why Don't You Shout Out My Name?

So I'm trying my darndest to update this blog as often as possible--daily if I'm lucky. But no one is THAT lucky. This is going to sound weird, but I feel instantly more attached to writing in this thing because not only has it become a bit more therapeutic as of late, but it's also gotten a lot more meaningful. I know I'm forever away from having a child or getting a smart enough dog to be able to read this, but just knowing that sometime in the future, someone that means so much to me is going to be able to read this and maybe get something from it is kind of amazing to think about.

With that said, here's lesson 2:

Things are often better than you think they are. Remember how I was bitching and moaning about my boss yesterday? Well, I still have my problems with her and probably always will until one of us leaves, but you know how people always say you should take a walk in somebody else's shoes (or maybe since this is years into the future no one walks, but hover-bikes or something everywhere and doesn't wear shoes! Wow, that'd be so cool. Well, if we have become so incredibly technologically advanced and lazy that we don't use our feet, shoes are basically clothes for your footies)? Well, you should. Or at least talk to someone who knows how it feels to be in your object of un-desire's shoes.

After work today, I was surprised by one of my absolute favorite reporters at the station when she invited myself, another associate producer, and two other senior producers to happy hour with her to thank us for all the work we've helped her with. I was supposed to go for a run after work to keep my training for the SF half marathon up, but hey, when beer and fried food is involved, why would I say no? If you are truly related to me, you'll understand. If you are truly related to me, you're probably eating or drinking something unhealthy for you RIGHT NOW. If you're not...just know that I'm a little ashamed. If you're offended by that...you need to learn your father's humor.

So we get to talking, and I find myself in a potpourri of girls aged 22 to 40 something. It's like being on the View (or that new ripoff of the View, the Talk. GREAT titles everyone. If you don't know what these shows are, do a Google search. Or Wikipedia it. It'll probably say something like "meaningless show where intelligent woman obnoxiously self-promote their own viewpoints on something and the unintelligent ones do the same thing except with stupider viewpoints" For the Talk, it'll probably say the same thing except with the phrase "but worse"), except I'm the Asian girl, but not really a girl. Me and the other AP are both the newest people at the station and when everyone's gone except my favorite reporter, she asks us how we felt about work and the people.

I was honest and told her about how hard of a time I have working with my boss. And she told me, "you do know she thinks the world of you, right?" The AP chimed in saying "yeah, she's always asking where you are, relying on you to do things." This shocked the crap out of me. Like, I literally may have turded my pants a little when I heard this. The reporter told me that my boss, like I said previously, just has a bad way of relating to people and has a hard time reassuring people of how positively she sees them. She agreed, she can be annoying and difficult to deal with like a case of the herps (well, she didn't say that; that was a self-drawn simile), but my boss is in a very difficult situation right now. Riding a spiral down from a demotion and a downsizing of her department that she manages, she has no control over the fate of her job at the station. Likely, she is freaking out herself and possibly taking it out on all of us. The reporter wisely told me that nothing is forever and until you can find out a way to change your circumstances, you need to make the experience what you want and need it to be and it never hurts to have compassion for ANYONE, even if it is the boss you dislike. She also reiterated something I truly believe in, and that is the fact that I sincerely believe things happen for a reason. I am not religious, but I do believe in a higher power that is pushing my life in certain directions; I can't think of any other way that my life has been this blessed and good.

So there you go. Things aren't as bad as you think they are. I thought my boss thought I was the biggest, laziest dumbass in the world, but turns out she actually likes me. She even admitted to me this morning that she has come to rely on me and congratulated me when I was offered the chance to write for the weekend news (which sucks because that means I have to work on the weekend, but hey, whatever). And, I never stopped to stand in her shoes and think about why she's the way she is and I never stopped to give her some compassion and empathy.

I guess there's two lessons here: as a follow up to yesterday's lesson of not taking life too seriously, also look at your life and see that things aren't always as bad as you make them out to be at surface value. And also, always be kind. Always have compassion. Almost everyone deserves that.

Lesson 2.5: Fridays are the best.

Love,

P

Bernhoft - Choices